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Editorial Staff

The war of words between Rocket Man Kim of North Korea and Orange Rug Man Trump of the USA escalated recently when Kim said "I've got the nuclear button on my desk" and Trump responded "I've got a button on my desk and my button's bigger than your button" (or some wording similar to this). It was all a bit of a giggle until Hawaii hit its own button and sent out across the whole GSM network messages to every mobile phone user telling them an attack was imminent and screaming "This is not a drill." We listened into the back channel between The White House and whatever house Kim is in. This is the conversation that never happened.

Editorial Staff

The rising tensions between North Korea and the USA are reaching a desperately disturbing yet ridiculously comical level. Here is a false conversation between the Supreme Leader of each of those countries.

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No comment is necessary for this document, a full republication of the official English version of a statement issued today by KCNA, the media arm of the government of the DPRK (North Korea).

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